The Guilfordian

Goof: Todd Clark leaves Guilford to star in “Kinky Boots”

Goof: Todd Clark leaves Guilford to star in “Kinky Boots”

Beariz Caldas, Editor-in-Chief

March 30, 2018


Filed under Goofordian 2018, In Print

Disclaimer: This story is a part of out April Fool’s edition, The Goofordian. This story was created by Guilfordian Staff and is not based in fact. It looks like saving a shoe factory has become Todd Clark’s new passion and priority. The Vice President of Student Affairs and Dean of Students has rece...

Goof: Top three albums for pretentious pricks

Lana Heltzel, Not a Hipster

March 30, 2018


Filed under Goofordian 2018, In Print

Disclaimer: This story is a part of out April Fool’s edition, The Goofordian. This story was created by Guilfordian Staff and is not based in fact. Oh, so you’re interested in getting into alternative and indie music? That’s great. No, it’s not like we didn’t already have enough plaid-clad...

Goof: Duck should be our student body president

Goof: Duck should be our student body president

Hannah Shoemaker, Not a Duck

March 30, 2018


Filed under Goofordian 2018, In Print

Disclaimer: This story is a part of out April Fool’s edition, The Goofordian. This story was created by Guilfordian Staff and is not based in fact. You know him. You may love him. You may fear him. And now, you will vote for him. When I first heard that that one weird duck (you know, the one with t...

Goof: Moon mission must stop, please, stop

Goof: Moon mission must stop, please, stop

Sydney Procos, Anti-Moon Activist

March 30, 2018


Filed under Goofordian 2018, In Print

Disclaimer: This story is a part of out April Fool’s edition, The Goofordian. This story was created by Guilfordian Staff and is not based in fact. What character building tasks can Guilford professors reasonably expect their students to partake in, and when should we draw the line? An intense deba...

Goof: School starts paying faculty with grill cash

Laura Hay, Staff Writer

March 30, 2018


Filed under Goofordian 2018, In Print

Disclaimer: This story is a part of out April Fool’s edition, The Goofordian. This story was created by Guilfordian Staff and is not based in fact. In an attempt to save money, Guilford will now be paying faculty and staff members 25 percent of their paychecks in Grill Cash. “When I first ...

Goof: Korean pop group BTS moves to Guilford

Aarushi Ahuja, BTS Army Foundation Chairman

March 30, 2018


Filed under Goofordian 2018, In Print

Disclaimer: This story is a part of out April Fool’s edition, The Goofordian. This story was created by Guilfordian Staff and is not based in fact. The Korean pop world was left in shambles on Friday, March 30, when global award-winning group BTS made an objectively unexpected announcement. On the grou...

Goof: President Trump is impeached via Twitter

Goof: President Trump is impeached via Twitter

Julia Martins de Sa, White House Correspondent

March 30, 2018


Filed under Goofordian 2018, In Print

Disclaimer: This story is a part of out April Fool’s edition, The Goofordian. This story was created by Guilfordian Staff and is not based in fact. On Thursday, March 29, 2018, the House Democrats’ official Twitter account, @HouseDemocrats, tweeted out, “Congress has voted today to impeach ...

Goof: Hated celebrities discuss downfalls, challenges

Madeline Edwards, Taylor Swift's Sister

March 30, 2018


Filed under Goofordian 2018, In Print

Disclaimer: This story is a part of out April Fool’s edition, The Goofordian. This story was created by Guilfordian Staff and is not based in fact. On Friday, March 23 Guilford’s Media and Celebrity Awareness Initiative hosted a panel on celebrities and their media fiascos. Lindsay Lohan, Taylor S...

Goof: Editor-in-Chief to marry Zac Efron in April

Goof: Editor-in-Chief to marry Zac Efron in April

Praveena Somasundaram, Maid of Honor

March 30, 2018


Filed under Goofordian 2018, In Print

Disclaimer: This story is a part of out April Fool’s edition, The Goofordian. This story was created by Guilfordian Staff and is not based in fact. She was an intern for National Public Radio and he was a star of popular films. Beatriz Caldas, The Guilfordian’s Editor-In-Chief, interviewed Zac Efro...