The student news site of Guilford College

The Guilfordian

The student news site of Guilford College

The Guilfordian

The student news site of Guilford College

The Guilfordian

The Valentine’s Day Love Scopes

Take your special someone out for a romantic dinner and a movie. By “dinner,” we mean getting busy, and by “movie,” we mean taping it.Roses are red, Violets are blue … Actually violets are violet. Ha ha.

SWMCD, N/D, N/S, AL ISO LTR … If you know what these abbreviations stand for, you’re not getting laid tonight.

If you can’t find ways to express your romantic feelings towards someone, try roses … or maybe Indian giving. Hmm.

What’s more romantic than 2- for-1 bowling? Dinner in the Walnut Room, duh.

For a good time, meet first-year Norman Foreman in the Walnut Room for a romantic dinner. Bowling to follow; he’ll be wearing leather chaps … and nothing else.

Whips, chains, handcuffs, ruffles – which one of these doesn’t fit?

Shotgun wedding … open bar … love is good.

Single? Go buy chocolate. Tons and tons of chocolate. Attached? Still chocolate, just use it … differently.

Sinfully salacious manslaves on exhibit in the Gallery this week for your viewing pleasure!

Cash in the V-card on V-day. For those this doesn’t apply to: take a V-card on V-day.

Nothing says “I love you” like E-Z Cheese. It’s even more romantic if you say it by spraying it all over your significant other; that really gets me going.

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