‘Tis the holiday season, and you know what that means: Winter Break. A long, luxurious month lounging around at home with your family. It’s nice for a while, you know, especially that first blissful week when you can actually feel your brain atrophying. But then the second week sets in, and the third, and you’re still cooped up in a house with your family. You’re beyond crazy. You’ve moved to the point where sanity is a cruel joke and the words “holiday cheer” send bile rising in your throat.
Face it, man. You’re bored. And there’s only one solution – well, only one that’s legal … You gotta do something. Anything. Doesn’t really matter what – which is probably why your’s truly is qualified to make suggestions. Just get off that arse and get going, ’cause holidays are just not the time for crazies or for comas. Here are ten things you can do instead:
Learn a craft. Why not learn to knit, do woodworking blow glass, crochet, weave baskets, or make sandals? The best part is that it’s just in time to cover your cheapskate butt with homemade gifts.
Exercise. My god, what a novel idea! You can work off pent-up frustration and that fruitcake at the same time. And this is a fool-proof excuse for leaving your house at any hour.
Catch up on movies. ‘Tis the season to watch those classic movies you always fake familiarity with. From Casablanca to Clue to Clueless, you can’t go wrong with the ol’ talky-box.
Play with your pets. Nothing in life is better than a fuzzy, and especially one whose entire butt is wagging with joy at seeing you. Show ’em you care.
Do some holiday cooking. Whether it’s sugar cookies, latkas, or groundnut stew, celebrate the season with some yummy food.
Make art. Be artsy-fartsy-pull out those old crayolas, that scrap paper, and Elmer’s glue and make a masterpiece. Like the crafts, this can solve your shopping dilemmas, and, if it turns out ugly, just give it to your near-sighted grandparents.
Spend time outside. The South is having a great winter for playing, but for you New Englanders …Well, it gets you out of the house. Go build a snowman or something.
Travel. Take a day trip (or a longer one if you can afford it) to a nearby park or museum. Or better yet, pack a rucksack and “run away from home” like you’re still a little kid.
Read a book … for fun. This is my personal favorite winter break pastime. Pick up old flames like the Lord of the Rings series or develop a new love. I personally suggest Hunter S. Thompson’s Hells Angels or Anthony Burgess’ A Clockwork Orange for sheer holiday shock value.
Study! I mean, just kidding…
Well, there they are, the foolproof sanity-savers of the holiday season. Be the first on your block to collect them all! Or maybe just hibernate in your room. You decide.