The student news site of Guilford College

The Guilfordian

The student news site of Guilford College

The Guilfordian

The student news site of Guilford College

The Guilfordian

Bowling is back

Dead little more than a month ago, the Bowling Club has sprung from the grave to become one of Guilford’s most popular Friday night hangouts. While bowling might seem more in line with A & T’s style than Guilford’s, every embodiment of the eclectic Guilford social scene was present at the March 23 meeting of the Bowling Club.

Dan Katzman, dressed like Andre Agassi circa 1985 complete with headband, ate pizza with a man in a giant banana costume as they watched “I’ll Bring the Lube” nail a tough spare against The Ruby Women.

Junior Noah Mace of Team Spandex wore white briefs on the outside of a shiny blue Spandex leotard with knee-high pink socks. “Why not?” said Mace.

More conventionally dressed citizens showed up as well. Senior Joey McLaughlin leaned back with a stressful week’s worth of beard and a mug of Yuengling. He took a long drag off a Maverick cigarette and grinned as he watched teammate “Brown Bear” miss all but one pin.

“I’m sitting here with my best friends, hanging out and having a great time,” said McLaughlin.

The phoenix-like resurgence of the club has been attributed to senior Tim Scales’ “senioritis.”

“We were sitting in the living room wondering what to do,” said Katzman, “and looked to Tim because he knows how to get stuff done.”

Tim found that there actually was a bowling club and a budget on the books but no members. Free pizza and an irresistible advertising campaign featuring Katzman’s photocopied face shouting “Bowling Club is Back!” filled the lanes almost instantly.

“Next thing you know, we’ve got 10 lanes with three free games and two free pizzas each,” said junior Katherine Rossini.

The AMF’s lone pizza oven struggled to keep up with orders, with delays up to an hour. Despite the lag, two pizzas per lane ended up being more than anyone could finish and didn’t dampen spirits. “The pizza fuels the rage!” said Dan Miller as he grabbed a slice of pepperoni.

Bowling and pizza might seem like an outing designed for third-grade birthday parties and middle-aged high school dropouts looking for a sport to accommodate their obesity and bad mustaches, but there were nearly as many women as men rolling for the bowling club Friday night at the AMF.

“It’s an easy place to get together and have some fun – even if you suck really bad. It’s not really competitive so everyone has a good time,” said sophomore Bailey Arnold of “Delta Squad.”

The computers at the AMF keep track of each team’s scores and give handicaps to keep all the matches even and challenging. Even if the best team in the alley plays the worst, it’s still a good game.

The night ended with a climatic simultaneous bowl-off between club president Tim Scales and a challenger, and when the applause died down, students meandered towards their cars leaving a wake of missing socks, empty Pepsis and half-eaten pizzas behind them.

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