The Guilfordian

Have wand, will balance: Hogwarts to send its Minister of Balance and Equilibrium

Linda Catoe, Staff Writer

March 30, 2012

*Disclaimer: This article is from an April Fool's issue* Suddenly there’s hope for the fog that used to be your mind, with help springing from the tips of familiar wands. In a joint effort between the Study Abroad program and the Center for Principled Problem Solving, Hogwarts School of Witch...

What frosts your pumpkin?

Zachary Thomas, Staff Writer

March 30, 2012

*Disclaimer: This article is from an April Fool's issue* “What frosts my pumpkin? The Greenleaf not accepting debit OR grill cash.” -Dallas Kesler, sophomore “The one thing that frosts my pumpkin (more than anything else in the universe) is organic chemistry! Try as I might to understa...

Nudist resort: bearing all flesh

Linda Catoe, Staff Writer

March 30, 2012

*Disclaimer: This article is from an April Fool's issue* Wouldn’t you just love to have been a fly on the wall at the last Board of Trustees meeting? A clothes-optional spa and resort’s offer to buy the land the board recently approved for sale was on the table for discussion. My first qu...

Early College parties: they do know how to

James Williamson and Don Cheeto, Staff Writer and Guest Writer

March 30, 2012

*Disclaimer: This article is from an April Fool's issue* To protect the identities of the guilty in this article, all minors’ names have been changed. Although Early College students are renowned for their antagonistic intelligence, we have yet to hear of their social life, whether in the h...

Letter to the Editor: why “Kony 2012” is trending

Maxwell Taylor, Guest Writer

March 30, 2012

More than 64,000,000 people have viewed the “Kony 2012” viral video since March 5 and expressed their loathing for Ugandan guerilla warrior and Lord’s Resistance Army leader Joseph Kony. The atrocities carried out by Kony for over 30 years have become household conversation in a week’s time....

Staff Editorial: Despite changes, the heart behind Serendipity remains the same

Anonymous

March 30, 2012

The past few years there have been complaints that Serendipity is not what it used to be, but then again, what is? The psychedelic-induced, keg-drinking, marijuana-smoking students that began this age-old tradition were not focused on their inebriation. Serendipity was, and will always be, about...

Playback: Greensboro vs. Greensboring?

Michael MacVane, Staff Writer

March 30, 2012

“I have heard the expression “Greensboring” before. However, I don’t think that is the case. I love the Greensboro Area. If you’re looking for a plethora of things to be handed to you, you might be disappointed. But if you are willing to look, you can find anything. My favorite thing is the...

Letter to the Editor: Response to the bonfire debate

Skylar Larsen, Guest Writer

March 23, 2012

I would like to address the ongoing debate regarding the campus woods bonfires, specifically, the Letter to the Editor published in mid-February. Though the style of the article was refreshingly different, I find myself completely disagreeing with the underlying purpose of Dobbins’s “modest proposal.”...

Survey reveals alarming prejudice among student groups

Victor Lopez, Staff Writer

March 23, 2012

For a minute, I thought the responses to a recent Guilfordian survey were more like the opening at Gettysburg than a civil discourse between college students who attend what is considered an open-minded place of learning. The survey of 117 students asked those attending Guilford, by way of the Center...