Early this year, incredulous fans heard the coming of an unlikely summer blockbuster — it’s called Snakes on a Plane (SoaP) and stars Samuel L. Jackson.When SoaP was first pitched in 1995, it was rejected by all 30 major Hollywood studios. After a brief shelf life, it seems Hollywood was finally crazy (or desperate) enough to reconsider.
Instantly, SoaP was a cult classic and the Internet was slithering with excitement.
As expectations for the film grew, cartoons satirized the concept, blogs became fascinated with the idea, and, according to The Guardian, SoaP became perhaps the most Internet-hyped film of all time.
After filming finished and SoaP garnered a PG-13 rating, the filmmakers decided to honor the Internet’s expectations of the film, which basically included Samuel L. Jackson storming around the fuselage of a plane killing rampant snakes and shouting I’ve had it with these mother f—ing snakes on this mother f—ing plane.
Director David Ellis increased the violence, nudity and profanity enough to warrant an R rating, and, to the delight of all, added Jackson’s notorious line to the script.
If you are hesitant about spending your money on SoaP, you should know that it reaches, surpasses and satisfies all expectations.
After a young man (Nathan Phillips) witnesses the murder of a prosecutor, he is picked up by FBI agent Neville Flynn (Jackson) to reluctantly testify. Unfortunately, the crime happened in Hawaii, and the trial is scheduled in Los Angeles. In a commercial airliner en route to L.A., Jackson and his witness discover hundreds of poisonous snakes making their way to the fuselage.
It is, as many expectant viewers must suspect, an utterly ridiculous film. Some might even be so bold as to call it convoluted cinematic trash, and rightly so, because finding morality or redeeming value in it proves to be as difficult as finding a conceivable plot.
If SoaP is trash, then it is superlative trash. Splendidly violent and unremittingly ridiculous, there are no less than 50 snake attacks, each one unique. Pick your favorite body part, no matter how private, and I guarantee that a snake bites it.
In one of the first attack sequences, a scene drenched in cultish sarcasm, a milk snake viciously attacks a woman’s bare breasts in the airplane restroom.
Also, besides simply having snakes on a plane, there are also snakes in any other scenario you might ask for. There are snakes in microwaves, snakes in a sex scene, snakes with drug use, snakes on fire, snakes being shot, snakes flying, dogs being thrown at snakes, and, according to agent Flynn, snakes on crack.
Though Ellis and screenwriters John Heffernan and Sebastian Gutierrez did a commendable job of exhausting all of these possibilities for SoaP, it is Jackson that commands the film’s true genius.
SoaP is the quintessential Jackson vehicle. In almost every scene, Jackson’s badass persona is highly reminiscent of his earlier projects (Pulp Fiction, Jackie Brown, Goodfellas, and Die Hard 3) with dynamic action sequences, electric monologues, one-liner quips and plenty of profanity.
Jackson also saved the film from a near disaster. Had the film been called Pacific Air Flight 121, which it had been originally, it never would have amassed its dedicated followers.
“We’re totally changing that back,” Jackson said. “That’s the only reason I took the job: I read the title.
When agent Flynn finally says the line that is sure to have audiences ecstatic “Enough is enough. I’ve had it with these mother f—ing snakes on this mother f—ing plane,” I found that I had not had it. In fact, I could have handled twice as many mother f—ing snakes on that mother f—ing plane.
That is for the future. At the 2006 MTV Movie Awards, Jackson made this proclamation: “No movie shall triumph over Snakes on a Plane, unless I happen to feel like making a movie called Mo’ Mothaf—in’ Snakes on Mo’ Mothaf—in’ Planes.”
I would gladly flock to any religion that could create that miracle.